Green Signal

Europe and North America are being painted a fresh new colour - green. Recently, two of the biggest political names in Britain, Gordon Brown and David Cameron openly engaged in a battle with each other over green issues, each trying to promote himself as the more environmentally conscious. While the Conservatives announced major pan-UK projects to reduce carbon emissions, the Labour Party made a pledge to ban energy-guzzling conventional light-bulbs by 2011. Meanwhile, a Lindbergh flight away, in North America, Dubya and Co are seriously contemplating cutting the American consumption of gasoline by atleast 20% in the next 10 years by switching to alternative fuels like ethanol. Neighbour Canada had already made a commitment last december to increase biofuel consumption to atleast 5% of total fuel consumption in the country by 2010. Iceland had long before adopted a resolution to ban fossil fuels altogether within 30 years.

Of course, one can't really believe that most politicians (no matter where they're from) actually are concerned - it's quite obvious that they (with a few exceptions like Al Gore) are playing for the green votebank. Global Warming, which politicians and public had earlier dismissed as just another theory, is now literally making them feel hot under the collar. Increasing industrialisation, urbanisation and major wars like the Iraq conflict have only made it more difficult for everyone. Scientists had predicted as long back as 1992 that Global Warming is a real phenomenon and will soon come into effect. And as usual, people have woken up a trifle later. Still, it's good to see that some efforts are being made.

But strangely enough, these critical issues aren't being discussed where they matter the most - the third world. It is in the developing countries that the fate of the fight against Global Warming is going to be decided. The BRIC nations and other such countries are going to be the actual battlefields. Why? It is because that in the next half-century, countries like China, India and Russia are going to be the fastest growing economies in the world. And economies can't grow quickly if industries don't grow quickly and rapidly growing industries imply rapidly increasing pollution.

The negative impact of such rapid growth is already being seen. In China, there have been riots in the smaller towns due to increasing pollution from nearby industries. According to the WHO, seven of the ten most polluted cities in the world are located in China. It is the second largest contributor to world carbon emissions after the United States but at the current rate of industrialisation, it can soon become number one. Industrial effluents released by Chinese factories near the Russian border have resulted in the contamination of many Russian rivers and the loss of jobs for hundreds of Siberian fishermen.*

The situation in India, though slightly better, is nothing much to talk about either. India accepted the Kyoto Protocol in 2002 but is exempt from the main framework of the treaty. This means that it has permission to pollute the environment to a greater extent than developed nations in order to pursue its economic objectives. Fair enough, but that doesn't change the fact that India better start worrying about Global Warming. Being an equatorial country with a large coastline, it is one of the biggest potential victims of this event and if measures aren't taken quickly, there'll be worse things to worry about than a bearish Sensex.

Pollution in India is rampant. This country has the highest percentage of premature deaths due to pollution in the world. India's energy consumption is increasing rapidly. Urbanisation and industrialisation resulted in a 208% increase in energy consumption from 1980 to 2000. Such figures have resulted in India's energy usage increasing at a faster rate even than that of China, which experienced a 130% increase in energy consumption in the same time frame. And worryingly, the major source of India's energy is the cheap, easy-to-build thermal power plant whose coal burning only makes the situation worse.

What's being done to address this issue? Practically nothing. The Environmental Protection Act was introduced more than 20 years ago but as usual, red tape in the bureaucracy has resulted in its unofficial death. India's forest cover is barely 25% of available land (the ideal figure is 33%) and is quickly diminishing. Far worse, projects by Indian companies, both public and private, can potentially contribute a lot to pollution. For example, there is the low-cost four-wheeler project by Tata Motors which will result in thousands of more cars on the road leading to more air pollution. And then there was the plan to legalize illegal encroachments in Bangalore's green belt that helped cut down a few more trees. Last year, I read an article in The Economist (i don't remember which issue) about how, at an environmental summit in Kenya(?), India's official delegate refused to introduce any legislations that would reduce emissions citing India's need to progress economically as an excuse. I wonder if he knew that economists have predicted that environmental pollution actually cuts out 8-9% of China's GDP every year. And what can happen to China can happen to us if we aren't careful.

Meanwhile, the environment continues to deteriorate. Forests are shrinking quickly and the climate's changing pretty fast but lots of people still haven't learnt. Recently, one of the last seven Amur leopards in the wild was killed by poachers which means that this beautiful animal's extinction is almost confirmed. And if a certain discovery channel programme is right, humanity will go the same way by 2100 if nothing is done within the next ten years.


*Source: The Internet: http://www.eia.doe.gov/emeu/cabs/chinaenv.html

Techie Torment

Finally, they've done it. The Indian government has finally woken up to the fact that hundreds of mobile phone users all across the country are being tortured by an obnoxious community known fearfully as the Telemarketers. After years of hemming and hawing, the government imposed a gag order on telemarketers. Incidentally, I was recently declared to be worthy enough of such calls (some guy called me about an ICICI Loan the other day...I told him I would take it if it was interest-free and the time limit to pay back the loan was to be decided by me...whereupon there descended an ominous silence on phone lines while the marketer tried to work out what I meant)

I don't really think it's going to work so easily though. This is India after all. Loopholes are meant to be exploited. For instance, how will the hapless phone owner prove that he or she had actually opted not to take telemarketing calls? What proof will they have? An SMS? The marketer can simply send the SMS from another number and later declare that the number from which the SMS was sent did not belong to him. Even if this is not all that feasible, there are more indirect ways. When the phone is put on roaming for example, the network provider can always send a "Welcome to Punjab!" message with a postscript like "XYZ Bank would also like to welcome you and remind you that you can always borrow a loan from them for..." Yep, these guys are clever.

But what is really very annoying is how these people get hold of our numbers. Who on earth gave network companies the right to distribute our phone numbers to these companies? Mark you, these providers also have with them our residential and office addresses as well as our e-mail ids. So far providers don't seem to have divulged this information but how long will that last? Now that telemarketing is almost as good as banned, will we get annoying letters at home or office or god forbid, have our e-mail accounts filled to bursting with spam?

It's really quite scary how much access these service providers have to our personal lives. A month ago, the Tata Indicom Broadband connection at my Bangalore home crashed for the umpteenth time. When the personnel turned up (three goddamn days later, I'll come back to that), he asked me for the password so that once he repaired the connection, he can renew our account. I told him I would type the password myself and did so. Later on, as usual, I checked my account and realized it hadn't been renewed. I called up the Tata Indicom guy and from his office, he CHANGED MY PASSWORD so that he could could renew the account properly!

I was shocked when he told me that he could actually change somebody else's password so casually. And by the looks of it, that sort of access isn't just restricted to one or two people. Practically everyone who worked in that office knows how to do it. If any one at that office decides to break company policy and get some free internet access, all he has to do is a little bit of clicking and typing and there! He'll get into somebody else's account. How easy it is to commit a fraud. So far, the people at Tata Indicom, inspite of all the problems that they pose, don't seem to have tried anything that's so blatantly criminal but how long will that last? What if some new employee turns up who isn't so conscientious and has no qualms about misusing the company technology?

Apart from these dangers, there are such ridiculous hassles to go through while dealing with these companies. Efficiency of the private sector my foot, some of these private companies are so incompetent that I actually wish I was dealing with a Public Sector firm instead. Take Tata Indicom for example. As I mentioned above, these guys take three or four days to reply to a simple complaint about a downed connection when in theory, they should have taken not more than 24 hours. Every time I call up their Customer Service Centre to bitch about their connection, their answer is always the same "Our lines in your area have come down because a car crashed into one of the poles. We will have it up again shortly" Nowadays I've become so tired of that excuse that I don't even have the strength to ask them why so many cars every month have such a fatal obsession for Tata Indicom cables (which are supposed to be underground by the way). And every blue moon when they do turn up at our house, the connection magically goes up again only to crash the same evening. Incredible.

All I can say is that these incidents only convince that India's booming economy is a farce. Oh sure, our companies are growing at 350,000% every second and acquiring every half-wit foreign firm that comes their way but they are yet to learn how to behave professionally. No courtesy or respect for privacy. No concern about customer security. Not the slightest bit of thought for customer service and welfare. When will Indian companies think of these?

Mind Your Language, young man

I had quite an interesting talk this morning with a guy who I ran into at a bus stop. He turned out be a current student of MES KK, my old school, the one where I had spent the larger number of my school years in. One likeable thing about MES is that it has (or had - I dunno what its like now) this vast kaleidoscope of characters who thronged the corridors and classrooms. As far as I know, MES hasn't yet turned out those nation-upsetting personalities that a lot of other schools boast about but I can assure you that one Kishore Kendra alumnus can never represent the characteristics of the entire school of students because these characteristics are so varied.

The guy I met today was a fierce kannada rakshak. This particular breed has a fairly recent origin and has started garnering attention only in the last two or three years. These guys are sort of like Karnataka's answer to the Maharashtrian Shiv Sena. "Karnatakavu Kannadigarige" is their war-cry and their speeches are full of how 'outsiders' are flooding the state (and Bangalore in particular) and taking away our riches. In fact, the recent preposterous move to rename Bangalore as Bengalooru was largely thanks to their efforts. Bal Thackeray, watch out - there are some new sheriffs in town.

This dude I am talking about was going on and on about how english has become the mother tongue of kannadigas and kannada is now full of english words. I have to admit he's right about that. Bangalorean kannada nowadays is about three-fourths english and it does get rather irritating. He perked up when I told him so and then declared "English has to be banned in schools! Our good children pick up english before they learn kannada and then they discard kannada for ever! English has to be banned."

I pointed out that he was making this entire speech in english and he hastened to correct himself and switched to our mother tongue. Children in Karnataka have to learn kannada. It is more important than learning english. They can always learn english later, perhaps in eleventh or twelfth standard. But kannada must be the main priority. I listened to him politely and then quickly made my exit by leaping onto the next bus.

These people take things to the extreme and that's a fact. Whether its the Shiv Sena in Mumbai or the Karnataka Rakshana Vedike in Bangalore, their rant is the same - protect your culture by fighting outsiders. I agree about protecting one's culture but the solution doesn't lie in attacking 'outside' or 'foreign' elements. That's a stupid approach. There are 'outsiders' in Bangalore who fight to preserve the city's character and even though I am (in the eyes of the SS) an outsider in Mumbai, I love that place and dont want its culture to deteriorate. By attacking non-native elements, these organisations are only taking the attention away from the real problem.

And what is this real problem? The real problem is that kannada culture in Bangalore is deteriorating not really because of the outsiders (though to some extent they are responsible) but because kannadigas do not do enough to promote their own culture in a positive manner. A couple of years before, kannada activists attacked a multiplex because the multiplex owners didn't give a lot of importance to kannada films. These activists claimed that the multiplex owners, being 'outsiders', were trying to undermine our culture. What? Why on earth would a multiplex owner be so vehemently anti-kannada?

The only reason that multiplex didn't treat kannada films properly is simply because those films didn't deserve that treatment. I'm sorry to say this but most kannada films released that year had insipid storylines with uninspired acting that simply didn't interest a multiplex audience. If only kannada film makers made movies that would catch the attention of such an audience, then no activist would be needed to enforce anything through force.

That's just one example. How many kannadiga families today read kannada literature and encourage their kids to do the same? How many have read the works of Kuvempu or Bendre? The answer is, not many. Not many people are aware today of the rich heritage that this state has. The closest glimpse they would have got would have been in kannada class in school. I admit that until recently, I was one of those people.

If the Karnataka Rakshana Vedike really wants to see kannada flourish, they better stop wasting their time with outsider-bashing and concentrate on promoting kannada among kannadigas. More than the outsiders, it is the insiders who need to learn the language.

Let's riot!

A few weeks back, we had Mr. N.R. Narayan Murthy fight what was probably his toughest battle until now. A remark about the national anthem made in the heat of irritation was pounced upon eagerly by the media who tore it apart and blew it to gargantuan proportions. "We didn't want the foreigners to be embarrassed." Well NRN certainly embarrassed himself instead with that remark.

Having grown up in the very city that NRN gained fame in, I've had the opportunity to see a lot of him in the media. I've never met him personally but having seen his work and achievements in the papers everyday for the last six years or so, I can kind of imagine what his character is like. Whatever remark he made, I'm sure the media misinterpreted it or NRN wasn't himself when he said it. It was totally out of character for a man who is well known for his integrity and concern for society.

Nevertheless, it kicked up a brouhaha that kept the media alive for a whole week. My question is - what for? Infosys played an instrumental version of the national anthem when Kalam came visiting. It was an insult to the president and to the nation. Uh excuse me, noble netas, don't they play an instrumental version at the Republic Day Parade in Delhi? But I guess you wouldn't know that, would you, since you would be fast asleep as usual while the Indian Army performs the anthem? Laloo Prasad Yadhav was caught happily sitting on a comfy couch while the national anthem was being played, yet no neta was concerned enough to raise a question THEN. Why don't you just admit that you were literally salivating for the smallest issue to malign Narayan Murthy? He's caused you quite a bit of trouble with his clean image and his quiet criticism of Indian politics, hasn't he? You're jealous of the public support that he gets, aren't you?

The politicians of today seem inclined to riot and cause mayhem at the slightest provocation. Attention-craving losers. No matter how small, how insignificant or how ridiculous the matter is, they go on a rampage. Somebody kissed somebody else. Let's riot! A statue of somebody was found broken. Let's riot! An inter-religious marriage. Let's riot! Somebody wears a short skirt. Let's riot! Somebody else rioted. Let's riot too!

What next? I suppose that since I talked about these issues, somebody will riot. If any neta gets to read this, they'll immediately have this blog banned. Most of them don't have the guts to come out and refute my views. Bullies that they are, they'll just wield their clout and get this site off the net. And of course, their chelas will go out onto the streets chanting curses against my name and burning effigies of me. If I'm noticeable that is. I don't think I'm that famous yet, so hopefully, this blog will stay on for some more time :D

Musically Deprived

There's a new kid on the block who's caught the nation in a spin. As hot as the Mumbai summer and as popular as vada-pav, this new sensation has turned the country's radio stations upside down. His name...is Himesh Reshammiyya. For the love of god, he seems to be everywhere. All we hear is Resham ga ga. No matter where I go and no matter who I meet, his voice can heard in the distance (and closer home too). He is God's biggest rival when it comes to being all around the place. Amazingly popular.

Personally though, I'm no great fan of the guy. He has certainly redefined music but that's not a redefinition I'd beg to agree with. His voice is too nasal and his themes are as rhetorical and boring as an election speech. And I'm seriously bugged with hearing him everywhere. For some reason radio stations cant seem to find anything to play but the Himesh Hour. I recently met this character who had aspirations of becoming an RJ. I told him that I would listen to his show (if he got one) only if he played stuff other than Himesh. He stared at me and said "But Amogh, dude, Himesh is the only thing we got! He is the only guy who seems to be constantly producing hit after hit. What else can people listen to?"

I gaped at him for a few seconds and then asked him which nutcase put such an idea into his head. "Have you even heard some of the music that's produced in this country?" I asked him. He asked me to give him some examples. I told him to go to the Thermal and a Quarter website and download one of their albums through BitTorrent. (For the uninitiated, Thermal and a Quarter is a Bangalore-based band that has written some of the most amazing songs I've heard). I also told him to check out the Parikrama and Pentagram websites (two more incredible Indian bands). The next day, he comes back to me with an ecstatic look on his face. "Dude, I loved it!" he cried. But then he tells me "But I'm sorry bro, the people who tune into FM Radios everyday won't like this stuff. This isn't marketable."

Which brings me to the main topic of this post. Why is it that Bollywood has such a massive monopoly over the Indian airwaves? What is it about Bollywood that makes the majority of Indian listeners such staunch fanatics who solemnly make a commitment never to hear any other genre again? Think about it, apart from a few Bhangra artists and some Pakistani rock bands, no other genre has broken into the mainstream. In fact, Bollywood is the mainstream.

It's not like there's no other good music in this country. Take the India's rock scene for example. Bands like TAAQ and Parikrama can cause mass hysteria internationally if given a chance. (In fact, TAAQ were once interviewed and their music played on America's National Public Radio once. Hours later, their website crashed due to excessive downloading from the US). They are already sort of like legends within India's cultist rock scene. They just need a break. Sadly, for most Indians, "rock" immediately conjures up an image of a long-haired freak bobbing his head up and down to something that sounds like two garbage cans crashing together. Come on guys, you don't have to grow your hair to listen to rock. That's only for the truly obsessed. You needn't go that far.

And it's not just rock. Take Indian classical music instead. Honestly, apart from the REALLY big names like Ravishankar and Zakir Hussain, how many classical artists have most Indians really heard of? Ever heard of someone called Pt. Kumar Mardhur? No? Well, I had the chance to listen to him at our college's annual music festival. When he sings, you get shivers up your spine. Yet, apart from a relatively small bunch of classical music fanatics, few people would have heard of him. Even established artists like L Subramanium and Vikku Vaidyanathan who deserve to have their concert tickets sold out in hours are relatively unheard of outside a certain community.

The most puzzling genre of all is Indian folk music. If you take a folk music piece, fuse it with a bollywood track and remix it a bit, you'll have nightclubs all over the country playing it until 3 in the morning. But try and persuade people to listen or dance to the same track in its original form, you'll get comments like "Oh, the remix was much better...why don't we play that?". Ask someone to dance a folk dance in its traditional form and you get loads of excuses. Ask them to dance the same dance to a bollywood track and you have people lining up to do it. Weird. Still, at least some of it is surviving in some form or the other.

The conclusion which I come to is that Indians in general are musically deprived and malnourished. They have this fixed mindset that only a certain genres are great and all the rest is not worth hearing. I havent even mentioned the REALLY exotic genres like celtic or african folk that are really worth hearing but there's no point in even writing about them. Indians really have to break out of this mindset. I'm not saying everything in Bollywood's bad, but then, everything in it isn't great either.

A little bit of engineering

Last week I had a nice little chat with one of my friends who has just completed twelfth standard and was getting completely frazzled over a bunch of exams that have scary abbreviations like the AIEEE, the CET and COMED-K. Deja Vu - I had witnessed a lot of my friends go the same way last year, totally freaking out over these entrance exams and wondering where they'll end up doing engineering.

Oh, it's always engineering. Never fear, engineering's here and it looks like its going to stay for quite some time in the minds of Indian students across the subcontinent. What's the big deal with engineering anyway? Why is there this constant obsession with the applied sciences? I have no idea if its an India-specific thing or not, but heck, its engineering, engineering, engineering every where you look. This career has an omnipresent quality in India that can rival Himesh Reshammiyya's sonnets of suroor.

Its tough being an arts student in this country. You are in the unfortunate position of shocking everyone by telling them that you're NOT doing engineering. Here's the typical conversation that takes place between me and some person who's never met me before:

SOME PERSON (SP): Oh, you're a student (pronounced stoo-daay-nn-ttuh)? Where are you doing your engineering?

ME (Blushing): Uh...I'm not...

AWKWARD SILENCE

ME: ...I'm doing BA...

And then SP will avoid me for the rest of the day. All the SPs of this world seem to believe that no matter what, Arts (and to some extent even commerce) students are failures who could not pass those abbreviated engineering exams and are forced to take up arts as a last resort. Weird. At least, Im studying in a reputed college like St. Xavier's. I can always get away with saying something like:

"Im an economics student at St. Xavier's..." those two italicized words can earn me some respect. Even if Im a failure, Im atleast a good failure. I not a failed failure.

Its not just arts students. Until some examiner working for the CBSE decided that my Class 10 maths paper deserved only an embarrassing 54%, I did have a tiny plan to take up pure sciences and go into astronomy. For two whole years, I had to put up with my aunt (who ironically is an astronomer) trying to push me into aerospace engineering and my mother constantly remarking on how bad the pure sciences field was. To top it all, some people decided that I wasnt even worth engineering (a remark that is normally considered extremely humiliating but then Im not normal). True, both my aunt and mother just didnt want me to take pure sciences and didnt care whether I got into engineering at all, but those other people felt otherwise. Bitter memories.

Anyway, the truth is that this nation cant think of anything but engineering. And of course management afterwards. The ultimate dream of every family is to boast of an IIT-IIM alumnus. Schools across the country go wild if one of their students get into the IITs and proudly display it on their websites. Sure, getting into the IITs is no small deal and the JEE topper has a right to be proud of what he or she achieved but man, its just as difficult to get into some place like, say, St. Stephen's (with a 97% cut-off rate for commerce students, beat that) or the Indian Institute of Science and very few schools seem to celebrate that. Economics anyone? Or perhaps a little bit of Astrophysics? I think not.